The personal god


A human being is born. Is raised by his parents, family and culture and is bred and moulded in accordance to the belief structures and the dos and dont’s around her. A mould that a human strives to maintain and sustain all his or her life. For when I examine my own life and how it evolved, there is a void that I arrived when I step beyond this barrier. And that goes something like this: If I am not who I am made out to be, then what AM I ? Then one has to come to a place of being a new born and question what was that entity? Or worse, even go to where and how did I come to BE that infant? A question many spiritual faiths and mainstream religions around the world have attempted to answer in their own ways. But no matter where I went to, seeking in my own quests, I came invariably to the same spot, metaphorically. And that is, in the end, it is always a personal quest. Not a public one. It is always my own answer that I choose to give it. Not the church, temple, mosque or a state. It is always an individual life. Always personal.

Of late, I have also been reflecting on the principle of god along the same lines. For when one speaks of god or the one god, one is invariably led into myriads of journeys on the various thoughts and philosophies about god. the various forms or the one form or even the formlessness or omnipresence, omniscience or omnipotent god and all such terms. But what is all that but words and more words to explain more words. I have not found in my little forays into god, explainable even remotely by mere words. For is god is indeed the creator of the universe and I am a part of it, how can it be trapped in the verbiage and vocabulary of a human made language of consonants and verbs? And where does one start then in this quest of god? Do I go seeking solace in the prayers of a church, in the gongs of a temple, or under more open ended search for gurus and masters that are out there, prophesying to be in touch with the creator? Or like many say look inward to find your creator. Creator is inside. And there are a number of words even there to explain more words. And so I spent a considerable years lost in this maze of words and spiritual jargon and verbiage.

Until some years ago. And I won’t give even a verbiage of terms here, since that only serves to fuel another fad of spiritual isms out there. Instead all I want to do here is to point out something for you to consider. But like everything else, I have found, god is also a personal god. a personal god. To each his own. It does not really matter, in the end, what one is born into or what one choses to change into in terms of faith. Its in the feeling. Its in the fleeting glimpses of goose bumps that one gets in the little things of life. Its in the soft whisperings of the wind. Its a great blue sky upon a sun shining day, taking a deep breath and feeling of well being. Its in the little voice inside you that says I am here, when you least expect it. Its in the healing that occur everywhere, or the answered mothers prayers for her child. Its in the thought that changes the course of a mans life. Its in the good luck that one ascribes to, the synchronicities of life that a human experiences. These are just a very few examples of a personal god that each of us experience. They are soft. They are gentle. They are felt tangibly. And yet there are no words to really describe it, are there? That is the personal god I am pointing to here. And personal god visits each one of us humans in our lives. Everyday lives. And if we as humanity, start acknowledging this aspect as a common to all of us and use that as a basis, the personal god will heal more wounds of the society, than will any man made structures of temples or churches or mosques. I believe it is in acknowledging this personal god that visits each of us, that we can really connect with one another. And it has no name. It has no place or purpose. It has no structure or logic. It simply is.